A Thousand Pieces
by ItsAHopeForAllTheHopeless
Summary: To this day I can still recall the feel of the cool leather against my cheek, the rough stitching of the patches beneath my fingers and the heavy smell of cigarettes filling my nose.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N quick note this is my first time writing a Sons of Anarchy fanfic currently I'm on season 5 but I know all the spoilers from season 7 so if their is any inaccuracies please let me know because I'm trying to make this seem as realistic as possible!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything it all belongs to Kurt Sutter etc….**

_A Thousand Pieces_

_By Itsahopeforallthehopeless_

_Belfast, Ireland 2026_

My brother left the day he turned eighteen, In a way I'd always known he was leaving us. I wasn't worried about him my big brother has always been able to fend for himself, Besides I already had a pretty good hunch where he was going….stupid Charming, California. It was a complete waste of time getting the police involved. All they did is asked us all sorts of idiotic questions about where we thought Abel might have gone. Seriously anyone who truly knew my brother would have known he was going stateside.

Mom's been crying all morning and my stepdad has been staring blankly at the wall, Its easy to see that he's a million miles away in a different time and place.

_Charming California, 2014_

It was a beautiful sunny December morning the day they buried Jackson Nathaniel Teller. It seemed to most as if God was playing some sort of cruel joke on them when they were in their darkest hours. There were motorcycles by the thousands everywhere you looked there was a bike glinting in the sunlight. They had come from all across the country to mourn the loss of John Teller's oldest son. The thunderous roar of engines filled the streets and shook the windows as the solemn parade passed by. But what Nero would remember the clearest that day wasn't the weather or the bikers, It was the anguish of seeing a little boy's heart broken into a thousand pieces. When the casket was being lowered into the ground was when the reality seemed to hit Abel full force. With an inhuman scream the six year old had lunged forward, If it hadn't been for the quick reflexes of Chibs and Tig the child would have fallen into the grave. Abel, limbs flailing fought the two men sobbing and yelling "Daddy, Daddy". Eventually Abel tired himself out and lay limply in the scotsman's arms exhausted. Their wasnt a dry eye in the crowd after Abel's outburst, even the most fearsome looking biker's had tears streaming down their cheeks. It was apparent that it was crucial to get Wendy and the boys out of Charming so Abel could heal without seeing constant reminders on every street corner.

A few weeks later the house had been sold, belongings had been packed and plane tickets to Ireland had been bought. Nero found a perfect little house in Belfast for Wendy and the boys. Nero would have preferred going to some other part of Ireland where the SAMBEL charter wasn't located. But as Chibs had reminded him Jax might still have enemies that could resurface one day and being close to the charter would be helpful if Abel and Thomas ever needed protection.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Thanks so much for all the kind responses, To answer the question of why I picked Ireland, it's mostly because I'm reading a book series set in Ireland right now so its honestly the first place I thought of. It does seem kind of unrealistic of a place for them to go…..but anyway heres the next chapter enjoy ;).**

_A Thousand Pieces_

_By Itsahopeforallthehopeless_

_Belfast, Ireland 2026_

When I was little my brother was my best friend, As we grew older I began noticing how his smile never reached his eyes they just stayed like cold blue ice.

My brother was damaged and I couldn't do anything but watch us slowly drift further and further apart.

I have few memories of Abel ever being truly happy, I blame our father for that I hate the man for making my brother the way he is. Our father is something Abel and I have always disagreed on. I despise Jackson Teller he was a murderer and a criminal he deserved to die.

I don't remember my father at all, I like to think its better that way it makes it easier to hate him.

I wish I could remember my real mother, I only know her through pictures and other people's memories. The only thing I have from my mother is my hair; it used to be blonde until I was around four years old then it slowly transitioned into a light brown color.

Now It's just another thing that makes my brother and I different.

_Charming, California 2026_

I stood frozen staring at the "Welcome to Charming" sign, one more footstep and I would be entering the place where I was born and my father lost his life.

A black crow sat perched on the top of the sign silently observing me with it's inky dark eyes.

The bird sent chills down my spine, I'd never been too fond of crows my whole childhood I was convinced a pair of them were following me. My mother thought I was crazy when I told her, she said I was making up stories but she never saw the crows only Thomas and I could see them.

I think it frightened her when we mentioned it eventually we just stopped talking about it.

I took a deep breath and moved forward past the sign. When I looked over my shoulder the crow was gone….as usual.

I walked along the side of the road with no real idea where I was headed, But I just needed to keep moving I had come to far to turn and run.

I'm not sure how long I had been walking when I saw the telltale iron wrought fence of the local cemetery; I knew my father was buried in there somewhere.

Not bothering to find an entrance I scaled the short fence dropping into the grass on the other side.

In the empty stillness I felt like the only person around for miles, Then I saw the man with brown hair in badly need of cutting crouched down next to a headstone with his back to me.

The grinning reaper on the back of the man's kutte threw me back to when I was six years old. I remember it was late at night but still I sat barely awake on the couch waiting. I hadn't seen my father for days he always left early in the morning before anyone was awake.

Sleep was threatening to take its hold on me when the door opened softly; I forced my eyes fully open and ran over wrapping myself tightly around his legs.

"Hey, little man what are you doing up" He'd whispered sweeping me up into his arms.

"I missed you Daddy" I said burying my face into his shoulder.

To this day I can still recall the feel of the cool leather against my cheek, the rough stitching of the patches beneath my fingers and the heavy smell of cigarettes filling my nose.

"Hey, you ok" A voice interrupted my reminiscing bringing me back to the present day. The man wearing the kutte stood in front of me, the president patch stood out on his shoulder.

"Uh, yeah I'm fine" I stuttered out and quickly walked past him, mentally cursing myself for acting so stupid.

Besides with my luck today my father's grave will probably be on the other end of this cemetery.

**A/N So who do you think was the man in the cemetery? And the crows weren't they pretty creepy? **

**Anyway….you'll just have to wait and see :) **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N the more I think about it Belfast probably wasn't the best idea to set half the story but it'll still work out fine. So sorry that its been so long since I updated I just got stuck on how to write Abel meeting Chibs &amp; Tig. Thanks again for the kind feedback I'm excited you all seem to be enjoying it so far….so enjoy ;).**

_A Thousand Pieces_

_By Itsahopeforallthehopeless_

_Belfast, Ireland 2026_

My mother is worried about Abel; I can see it in her eyes. I hear her crying sometimes at night and it kills me that my brother crushed her like that.

But I know he needed to leave to be able to find himself and figure out all that shit he's been keeping buried. God knows he sure has been keeping it hidden pretending it doesn't hurt him anymore…but it does.

The first time I ever really noticed that was when I was seven maybe eight years old, It was a dreary rainy Saturday afternoon mom had been suddenly called into work to pick up a shift for a co-worker who hadn't shown up. Abel had been left in charge of me, which he was quite proud of being given such an important responsibility. Anyway we were playing and Abel just stops and looks up at the window. Then he turned to me and says, "Thomas, Do you think raindrops are really tears of the people in heaven crying?".

I just stared at my brother in complete shock; I was only seven for crying out loud why would I even have an answer for that!

_Charming, California 2026_

It was getting late; the sun was beginning to sink behind the trees. I'd been searching for my father's grave for an hour or more now, I decided it would be easier to come back another time when I knew where to go.

The next task was finding somewhere cheap to crash. I had a bit of money leftover, not much and the fact it wasn't all even American currency might be a bit of a problem too but I would cross that bridge when I got to it.

There was a weather beaten motel a little ways off main street, The inside of it looked like it hadn't been cleaned since before I was born….If it ever was. But it was cheap and would do for tonight plus the idiot running the front desk was way too drunk to notice the money difference.

I can't decide if I should call my mother or not. I want to let her know that I'm ok but then I'd end up listening to her yell about how stupid it is to come back here.

I know my father never wanted me to come back here, wanted me to hate him and to hate the "Life". But I can't fucking do it, I just cant bring myself to hate the man.

Since I was born my father was a constant presence in my life. Sure I didn't spend as much time with him as other kids do with their Dads. But he was around and loved me some kids don't even have that.

I don't forgive him for the things he's done, I never will.

My father killed innocent people tearing apart families without a second thought. He was blind with rage in his search for never ending retaliation digging himself deeper and deeper as the bodies fell in his wake.

But he succeeded on that highway in what he set out to do all those years ago, he got SAMCRO out of guns for good.

He wasn't a good man, but I know now he once was and I'll prove it to Thomas one day if he would just listen for once in his life.

To say my little brother was stubborn would be an enormous understatement, We used to laugh when he was little and would throw temper tantrums because his face would get so red it looked like he was going to explode. Mom had said once that she'd been told our father did the same thing when he was a kid.

_The Next Morning_

I had scrawled the address of Telford-Trager Auto on a scrap of paper before I left Ireland, It's the only part of my research I took with me.

The lot looked the same as I remembered; It was difficult to tell for anyone who hadn't seen it before that it had been rebuilt from the burned ashes up.

There was a handful of mechanics bustling around the garage already busy at work. A little ways off from the garage two older men wearing kuttes sat playing checkers.

In the office there was a woman with dishwater blonde hair bent over a stack of paperwork. "excuse me" I said startling her slightly. The woman studied my face intently, "can I help you with something" she asked carefully. "I'm looking for Fillip Telford, Is he here?" I replied. "I think he's over outside by the tables" she offered. "Thanks" I replied flashing her a smile. "Wait" she called and I turned around, "Have we met before?" she said. I shook my head; I had no memory of ever meeting her, she frowned and went back to her paperwork.

Outside the two old men were still playing checkers except now there were in some sort of argument.

"Dammit Tiggy, Yer fuckin cheating again " The first man growled

"Am Not, You can even cheat at checkers" The second man said smirking while the other man rolled his eyes.

I approached the table and the second man turned in his seat catching sight of me his jaw dropped, "máthair Dia" he gasped out in shock. I knew immediately when I saw the glasglow smile that I had found Flillp Telford. Though I have no idea what he just said but it certainly got the first man's attention. His green eyes widened in surprise, "Jesus Christ" he whispered roughly. Their reactions were kind of strange ones but I knew from the photos I had scavenged that I could pass, as my father's look alike, so to these two men it would be like seeing a ghost. Mr. Telford stood up and pulled me into a hug, "it's been a long time kid' he said softly.

I feel of the leather and patches of the kutte under my fingers sent a phantom pain through my body.

**Gaelic Translation: **máthair Dia = mother of god.

At least I hope that's what it means since I don't really trust google translate


End file.
